I can't stay

for the first time in months I could experience what it feels like to kiss you and feel nothing. somehow I managed to leave you in the past, and now it has all crumbled. I'm sorry for not being honest and telling you how I feel right away, but somethings are better left unsaid, at least for the time being. I want you to know that you're special and you made me feel incredibly young and brave again. but everything must come to an end, and we're not an exception. I don't feel like any of us wasted our time while we were together. But now it has come to my senses that we're so different and.. I wish you well and I need some more time to say goodbye - I'm preparing to tell you the things I think out loud in a proper way. we'll see each other soon.

g

change of coast

I allowed myself to hold your hands for a few seconds as we walked down the avenue towards the train station. Your fingertips were awfully cold and your wrist was partly covered by your dark blue jacket, which helped us disappear onto the night. I could tell you were warm inside when you smiled back at me. We were both happy and excited, because we knew by then that what we have is different. I just want to try keeping that feeling.